SCIENCE!

I’m sure all of you have seen eHarmony’s commercials (such as this) where eHarmony claims to use a “scientific” system.  Tamerlame let us know that eHarmony was banned from saying their system was scentifically proven since eHarmony failed to provide any evidence that science was involved in their system.  This should not be a surprise to anyone who reads this blog as this is no different to how gamers tried to claim game was “scientific” and failed to provide evidence.

There is no science to be found in any form of dating advice because they are all scams.  This is not obvious to most people as most people’s understanding of science is a combination of yelling “SCIENCE!” like in the “She blinded me with science” song, fake science such as that from the “I fucking love science” crowd/site, and Neil deGrasse Tyson memes.  In reality, science is a process involving such things as gathering evidence, testing hypotheses in experiments, and verification by attempting to replicate results.

In other words, most people wouldn’t know what science is even if science bitchslapped facts into people.  Most people just yell, “SCIENCE!” to maintain the pretense that they didn’t manufacture their beliefs out of thin air because it benefitted them.  This is why when dealing with scams like dating advice we can never let up when it comes to demanding that they produce evidence that shows their claims are correct (even though we know they are unable to do so).

 

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Why The Issue Of Social Acceptability Matters

In my last post, I introduced how the issue of social acceptability is important when it come to dating, sex, and relationships.  It is also important to address why this issue is important.  This can be explained with the following example.

A man who is lost and happens to be alone gets falsely accused of being of rapist (to the point of being reported to the police) simply for asking for directions.  We know this would not have happened if this man was accompied by a woman.  This man could have had a girlfriend or a wife (or be gay but that is besides the point here).  Since his wife or girlfriend (if he had one) was not with him, his status was the same as an incel so he gets falsely accused of being a rapist.

Since this can happen to men with girlfriends or wives, it’s a thousand times worse for a man who has trouble getting a girlfriend.  This shows that the issue of social acceptability in dating, sex, and relationships goes far beyond just being able to get a girlfriend or get laid.  If a man is unaccompanied by a woman for too long, he is in danger of being falsely accused of being a rapist.

What A Girlfriend Can Do For You That No One Else Can? Provide Social Acceptability

Dr. Manginalove has a new post on the Dickless Mangina Project.  (Like with most of his other posts, the only comments come from men pointing out everything that is wrong with what Dr. Manginalove says.)  Manginalove starts out with the following.

There’s a very common issue I see among guys who’re looking for a girlfriend: they’re just not ready for one yet. Many guys go full-tilt boogie into finding themselves a girlfriend as soon as possible without having laid the emotional groundwork.

Many guys?  Try every guy.  When guys start looking for a girlfriend, they don’t give a shit about “emotional groundwork”.  And why should they?  Enough guys are able to get a girlfriend and/or get laid without doing “emotional groundwork”.  That proves that this so called “emotional groundwork is completely unnecessary.  What Manginalove is trying to do here is invoke the Just World Fallacy and Feminist Time Machine and hope you don’t notice.  Unsurprisngly, Manginalove does not define what this “emotional groundwork” is supposed to be because doing so would get many comments from men showing that they are meet whatever criteria Manginalove would come up with.  Because of that Manginalove is using circular reasoning trap to say if you have never had a girlfriend, then you have done “emotional groundwork”.  The evidence for not having done the “emotional groundwork” is that you have never had a girlfriend.  There is no objective criteria anywhere.  Thus, we can only conclude that Manginalove is lying.  It gets worse from there.

What Do You Expect To Get From A Girlfriend (That You Can’t Get From Anyone Else?)
One of the first things I ask people who are desperate for a relationship is simple: why?

“…I thought that was obvious, Doc.”

It’s a more important question than you’d think. One of the biggest mistakes that a lot of guys make – especially guys who are socially inexperienced – is that they expect their future girlfriend to be all things to them. They want companionship, emotional intimacy, a helpmate, someone who’ll make them feel special. They want someone who’ll make them want to get up in the morning and that they’ll look forward to seeing at the end of the day. Oh, and blowjobs on the regular.

Which is great and all… but the thing that many guys fail to ask is why they’re not getting these already from their other relationships.

OK. Maybe not the blowjobs.

(Or maybe those too. I’m not judging.)

One of the things that tends to kill relationships is the tendency for men to put all their emotional eggs into one particular basket. Thanks to the way that we’re socialized, straight men are taught to try to get all their emotional needs met by their romantic partners.

This is a canard I have seen a lot (which deserves its own article at some point), that the real problem is that dateless men lacking friends.  Unless a man is bisexual, this makes no sense, yet we see this canard over and over again.  There are aspects of this that involve trying to trick dateless men into homosexuality to get rid of them (which isn’t done as much as it was a couple of decades ago), as seen with Manginalove’s “joke” about blowjobs.  However, that is missing the point.  First, sexual relationships are by definition more intimate than non-sexual relationships.  It’s not unreasonable to have a deeper trust of your girlfriend than just your friends.

Second, and more important, having a girlfriend and having friendships are connected but in the opposite direction that Manginalove says.  If you never had a girlfriend, you are in danger of losing friends through no fault of your own.  There are men I have been friends with for decades that I have lost as friends as soon as they got a girlfriend.  I have talked to and known many other men who experienced the same thing.  (All my enemies reading this will say that it’s because of my behavior or some other nonsense.  I can prove that wrong since in several cases the girlfriends never met me.)  What happened was that their girlfriends didn’t want undesirable single men around.  The men go along with this because the girlfriends can provide sex.  I can’t.  It’s not that having friends makes it easier to find a girlfriend.  It’s that having a girlfriend is the only way to keep many of your friends.  This is a bigger problem than even that.  A lot of social activity takes places only between couples or people who are in couples.  Obviously, to be a part of that social activity, you don’t need to be in a couple all the time, but you do need to be in a couple at least in a semi-regular basis.  It’s a case of the poor getting poorer and the rich getting richer.  Or in this case the dateless getting more dateless.  In other words, the only way for a dateless man to stop this downward spiral is to get a girlfriend, any girlfriend.

While there are other answers to the question of what a girlfriend can provide that no one else can, the ultimate and final answer to that question is social acceptability.  Without social acceptability men lose their friends, get shut out of social activity, and have more trouble getting a girlfriend in the first place.  The only comment to Manginalove’s post makes this clear.

So to sum it up. Another article from DNL about how men always have to change, and be deserving. Not a single word about what women are expected to change. You know what DNL, maybe if women stopped judging men by their lack of previous girlfriends. Then maybe men wouldn’t be so desperate to get girlfriends. I know you grasp this concept perfectly well when it comes to “slut-shaming”. But somehow the shaming that women do seem to be a totally taboo subject to you.

Dateless men get falsely accused of everything from being useless and disorganized (as Manginalove does in his post) to being terrorists in waiting (even though the evidence says the complete opposite).  The only way for most men to avoid this fate is to get a girlfriend.  Thus, many men are desperate to get a girlfriend.  It’s that simple.  Since dating advice for men is female centric, it is assumed the only reasons why men pursue women is being horny and entitlement for women’s bodies.  While there is truth about the being horny part, the entitlement canard is a total lie.  I have talked to lots of dateless men.  Not one of them believes they are entitled to women’s bodies.  What they want is social acceptability and to not get falsely accused of being a potential terrorist.

Dating advice ignores the issue of social acceptability being tied to having a girlfriend because it makes women look bad and brings up uncomfortable questions about women.

Evidence That Virgins Are Not Murderers Or Terrorists

Read the new page, Evidence That Virgins Are Not Murderers Or Terrorists.  Comments are closed here so comment on the page.

Lowering Your Standards And Subjecting Yourself To Abuse Are Not The Same Thing

One piece of dating advice you will hear occasionally is to “lower your standards”.  One reason its a common piece of dating advice is that it is designed to accuse a man of only chasing after supermodels.  Thus, his datelessness is due to being an asshole and completely his fault.  In reality, that is not what is happening.  Men don’t need to be told to lower their standards because they have already done that.  Ironically, this would be good advice for women because they’re doing what men are accused of doing.  In fact, telling men to lower their standards is nothing more than a huge case of projection.

When you get past the “unwilling to data non-supermodels” BS, there’s another aspect of “lowering your standards” that is very dangerous.  Here is an example that came from another thread asking the denizens of the ForeverAlone reddit if they would rather be single or a cuckold like the previous one I wrote about.  One man answered that he would rather be single, and this was a serious response.

then I think perhaps your standards are a bit too high.

If you ask me I would choose to be a cuckold without a doubt

Refuse to be abused as a cuckold?  Your standards are too high

Refuse to be abused as a victim of small penis humiliation?  Your standards are too high.

Refuse to be beaten up and abused by a dominatrix?  Your standards are too high.

We know that The Reserves attracts predatory women who want to humiliate and abuse men with few or no options.  This is the reason being a cuckold is coming up so much now on the ForeverAlone reddit.  Any man who refuses to be abused and humiliated as a cuckold (or a recipient of small penis humiliation, or a recipient of abuse from a dominatrix, etc.) will be shouted down with “your standards are too high”.  They will also be told they are not really ForeverAlone because they have the option to be abused and humiliated.  There’s a difference between lowering your standards and subjecting yourself to humiliation and abuse, but predatory women and desperate women are trying to smear them together.

Reserves Desperation Derangement Syndrome

What happens to a man who stays in The Reserves long enough without realizing that he’s better off without women?  Eventually, he will suffer from what I call Reserves Desperation Derangement Syndrome from the waiting.  The ForeverAlone subreddit (which is no longer about being forever alone since it is now controlled by women in relationships and maginas who worship them) has good examples of Reserves Desperation Derangement Syndrome.

One one end, we have a forever alone man who found a girlfriend.  Sounds good, right?  Except that she’s 10 years older than him, and she using him just to have a kid.

Basically she is 10 years older than me and absolutely desperate to have a kid before it’s too late, if it’s not already.

She keeps telling me how much having a child will change me for the better and she thinks we will have kids soon

The man who wrote this is aware that he is just being used so that his girlfriend can have a kid.  His follow up comments make it clear that he know that he is just being used for his money.  It’s previous obvious that as soon as she has his kid and his money, she will dump him and go back to the men she actually wants to have sex with.  This sounds pretty bad but compared to the next example, this was a weak case of Reserves Desperation Derangement Syndrome.

Someone decided to ask the ForeverAlone subreddit if they would rather be single forever or be married to a woman that cuckolds them.  A significant fraction of the responses were men who would be willing to be married to a woman that cuckolded them even though they would get nothing they wanted from the deal.  (Fortunately, a lot of men still had their self respect and chose to be single forever instead.)  The men willing to be cuckolds are the ultimate in Reserves Desperation Derangement Syndrome.  They are so desperate that they are willing to be cuckolded by a woman.  They won’t get want they want because being cuckolded especially in their case is just play acting at a sexual relationship with a woman.  These men represent the ultimate goal of keeping men in The Reserves, conditioning men to accept any behavior from a woman, no matter how abusive.  And that is what cuckolding is, particularly in this case, abuse.

Someone may say that these men have a sexual fetish.  That is clearly not the case.  Holding these men in The Reserves has conditioned brainwashed them into willing to be cuckolded and abused.  Their own words make it clear that they do not get off on a woman cuckolding them.  It’s clear that they are so desperate for female contact of any kind that they are willing to let themselves be abused by women.  There are plenty of women ready to take advantage of these men from dominatrices trying to find more customers to women who get off on small penis humiliation.

The only answer to this is to refuse to be a part of The Reserves and GYOW.  When a man goes his own way, he won’t be abused by a woman (at least not directly, being abused by the state working on behalf of women is a different matter).  He will also have his self respect intact.

Going Green Will Not Get You Laid Because Of The Just World Fallacy

I have talked about how dating advice is used as a scam to convince people to believe in a particular ideology.  While the manuresphere is a good example of this, using dating advice to make men believe in a particular ideology is not limited to them.  The Dickless Mangina Project has a page about how going green will makes men attractive and sexy (and by extension get men laid).

If going green will get a man laid, then it should be easy to show examples of ugly and poor men who go green and become attractive to women.  The page has no examples.  In fact, the two examples the page gives of guys who are going green are a rock star and a rich and famous actor.  Both men are good looking.  Women would be attracted to them whether they were going green or industrial level polluters.  This shows that going green has no effect on a man’s attractiveness.  If a man is already attractive, then going green won’t have a negative effect, but it won’t have a positive effect either.  If an unattractive man goes green, women won’t care and will treat him the same as they did before.

A while ago, I was in downtown Vancouver for several days.  There was this homeless guy who was picking up trash and trying to keep part of the downtown area clean and green.  (He was doing this as a form of panhandling, but he was trying to do something rather than just hold his hand out.)  It was pretty obvious that this homeless guy was not getting laid at all.  His decision to be green did not help him proving the page at The Dickless Mangina Project to be a complete lie.  This is just another example of trying to use dating advice to manipulate men into a political ideology.

Why are there all these attempts to link being successful at getting women with believing in the “right” political ideology?  It is because most people believe in the Just World Fallacy when it comes to men and dating/relationships/sex.  They believe that a man who is successful at getting women must have the “right” politics whatever they believe the “right” politics to be.  This is because having the “right” politics is believed by most people to be equivalent to being moral and virtuous.  In the page from The Dickless Mangina Project, the “right” politics happens to be environmentalism.  For others it is feminism.  For the manuresphere, it is racism and anti-semitism.  The reality is that the Just World Fallacy is a fallacy for a reason.  There is no connection between being attractive to women and having a particular set of political beliefs.  In fact, there is no connection between being attractive to women and being moral and virtuous.